Wiser's De Luxe 10 Year

Canadian Whisky
Purchase Price: $13
Place of Purchase: Struthers Beer and Wine - Struthers, OH
Rating: 8.3

When I was visiting Ohio last summer, I ended up buying a bottle of this as a supplement to my nightly drinking forays to various Mahoning County bars. I had never heard of it, but it was inexpensive and a little voice inside my head subtly suggested that it was going to be better than the low price would indicate. For once, my instinct was right! This is a great Canadian whisky and I’ve since learned that Wiser’s is an old and respected brand in Canada. I think their distribution is pretty spotty here in the “Southern 50” so you may have a hard time finding it. But it’s worth hunting down, or at the very least, snatching up a bottle if it and you should ever happen to cross paths. This whisky hearkens back to the days when Canadians ruled the roost. It’s probably the most muscular Canadian out there, full-bodied, full-flavored and fully worthy of a spot on the shelf.

Pan Tadeusz

Vodka
Purchase Price: $18
Place of Purchase: Warehouse - New York, NY
Rating: 8.0

This vodka wasn't named by accident. Pan Tadeusz is an epic poem of Poland and incredibly enough, this vodka is distilled in Poland. The lettering on this frosted bottle of vodka is an exact reproduction of the frontspiece on the first edition publication of the poem from 1834. What's inside? Well, this is yet another one of those easy to drink vodkas you can usually find for under 20 dollars a pop. A facilitator you can share with family and friends alike. I think there are now officially 3,240 different kinds of vodka being sold in the United States. That’s more vodkas than Rod Carew had hits! Even more amazing was that in 1980 there were exactly 3 different brands of vodka being sold in the U.S.: Stolichnya, Absolut and Finlandia. The explosion in this category has been truly astonishing—a real tyranny of choice for 21st-century imbibers! In any case, this one is worth your time.

Michael Collins

Irish Whiskey
Purchase Price: $29
Place of Purchase: Astor Place Wine and Spirits - New York, NY
Rating: 7.8

Michael Collins is a high-priced new addition to the Irish Whiskey market. It comes in a bottle that really sets some new standards of elegance, but in terms of taste and degree of palate-pleasing, I don’t sense that much difference between this and your garden-variety Bushmills or Jameson. I’m also not real sure I agree with the exhuming of dead people, heroes or not, to sell alcohol. I mean, did Michael Collins have a say in any of this? He probably doesn’t care, but criminy, can’t we just let people rest in peace? Benjamin Disraeli gin, Pancho Villa tequila, H.L. Mencken rye, Boris Pasternak vodka, Bob Marley rum--where will it all end? With Johnny Bench scotch????? Heaven help us!

Jack Daniel's

Tennessee Whiskey
Purchase Price: $22
Place of Purchase: Warehouse - New York, NY
Rating: 7.8

Is this the most famous liquor on earth? I'm not sure what else would top this brand’s name recognition, I mean just think about it. Their logo and lettering have been copped by everyone from Evan Williams to Lynyrd Skynyrd. In fact, in 8th grade, I proudly wore to school a Lynryd Skynryd baseball shirt (black body with white sleeves, naturally) that I had purchased over the summer in some beach town in Florida. It was basically the Jack Daniel’s logo with the words Lynyrd Skynryd in place of Jack Daniels. My homeroom teacher had a conniption because this shirt had the word "whiskey" on it and told me I could either put on another shirt or go home. He cited a school policy that stated students were forbidden to wear clothing (including Hamm’s belt buckles in the shape of a keg, as another student found out later that year) promoting alcoholic beverages. Otherwise the roof of the school might fall in. Looking back, I should have walked out with my dignity intact and spent a pleasant day at home watching those 15 minute kid's shows PBS used to broadcast and playing “Berzerk” on Atari 2600, but I ended up borrowing a friend's gym shirt and stuck around for the day’s studies, not one lesson of which I can remember today. JD is not my favorite, but it's not bad either. I mean it mixes well with Coke, I guess. It’s simply a tidal wave of saturation marketing and “invasive” distribution (I’ve even seen it sold in hospital gift shops!) so why not ride along with all the other folks?

Tomintoul 10 year

Single Malt
Purchase Price: $28
Place of Purchase: Union Square Wine and Spirits - New York, NY
Rating: 8.0

This young spirit, from one of Scotland’s youngest distilleries, is as friendly as Casper the ghost and almost as light and airy. Can you imagine the uproar if Casper ever got drunk? I hope it never happens because I don't think kids need to see something like that. In any case, back to Tomintoul, there’s just enough maltiness at the bottom of this Speyside whisky to prevent it from floating away like your average Lowlander is wont to do. Speaking of floating away, I can still vividly remember the time I was five years old and decided to get “cute” with the helium balloon that had been purchased for me at one of the local department stores. Despite the protestations of everyone around me, I insisted on letting go of the string it was tied to and then snatching it back real fast. I should add that this was taking place outdoors, in the back yard of my home. Needless to say, about the third time I pulled this little stunt I missed the string completely and my Panda-shaped balloon gracefully floated away. Forever. Some lessons are best learned with a side serving of tears and that was one of them. Tomintoul 10 year isn’t likely to make you cry anytime soon, but it’s a decent enough malt priced every bit as reasonable as the advice the adults were trying to impart to me that day. I like it.

Boodles

Gin
Purchase Price: $15
Place of Purchase: Chalet Premier Wines - North Lima, OH
Rating: 8.3

Boodles is as every bit as quirkily British as its name, like a Bristol Blenheim motoring up the A417 packed with a group of Morris Dancers on their way to the Cooper’s Hill Cheese Rolling “celebration” of broken legs and irreversible head injuries. Actually, it’s a bit more elegant than that, and in fact one of my favorite gins. It embraces tonic like a long lost brother in arms and makes a Martini that’s as snappy and stiff as the brim on a bowler. What more can you ask of gin than that?

Wild Turkey Rye

Rye
Purchase Price: $22
Place of Purchase: Warehouse - New York, NY
Rating: 8.3

I remember a lot of young people going “wild” for Wild Turkey 101 proof bourbon back when I was in college many years back, but I never really adopted it as one of my own. I used to drink, of all things, Rebel Yell--fascinated by the brand’s insistence that it “not be sold north of the Mason/Dixon line.” (I went to school in Georgia) These days I haven’t had a swig of Rebel Yell in close to two decades and Wild Turkey has this great-tasting rye that has quickly established itself as one of my favorites. This opens with plenty of eye-opening rye notes, moves onward to some exotic spiciness and then there’s some menthol that creeps into the picture, which instantly reminds me of smoking Newports back in the woods in 7th Grade. We’d literally just stand in the woods smoking, as if it were an “activity” or something. I guess it’s a good thing that I presently pass my time with more worthwhile pursuits like drinking!

Kentucky Vintage

Bourbon
Purchase Price: $20
Place of Purchase: Warehouse- New York, NY
Rating: 8.0

This bourbon has a very low profile but the label has a distinctive "charred" edge that puts me in mind of that monumental June evening in 1985 when a bunch of teenage roustabouts I called friends backed up a station wagon to the remains of a local restaurant that had burned down and proceeded to load this innocuous suburban vehicle with about 100 slightly smoke-damaged bottles of various liquors. I’m not sure what it says about our drinking habits back then, but this treasure trove of purloined booze managed to last all of four months. Kentucky Vintage is a decent if somewhat undistinguished small batch bourbon. But at least you won’t get your hands sullied with black soot when you pick it up to pour it!

UV

Vodka
Purchase Price: $13
Place of Purchase: Warehouse - New York, NY
Rating: 7.8

The logo and even quite possibly the name of this vodka appear to be squarely aimed at young binge drinkers looking for something hip (and not quite so expensive as the super-premiums) to sip while standing in front of a bar backlit with a really sensuous blue light with modern-day Emo songs wailing away in the background. A quick spin around the UV website confirms this. It comes in something like ten different flavors, each with its own garish color. Pop Art vodka! I opted for the plain “see-through” iteration and it really wasn’t that bad. This budget vodka would rather not be consumed by anyone over 30 so check your ID before purchasing.

Barbancourt Estate Reserve 15 Year

Rum
Purchase Price: $30
Place of Purchase: Warehouse - New York, NY
Rating: 8.4

Really nice stuff from the world-famous tourist destination of Haiti. Who could imagine that one of planet Earth's least inviting places could be capable of creating something so engaging? Everyone "in the know" says this is a great rum, and for once you can trust the chattering masses to steer you in the right direction. This is a classic “escapist” rum, capable of transporting you to a peaceful place where palm trees dance in the wind and the surf pounds to a misty stop right at your feet, no matter if you live in a drab suburban tract home outside of Wichita, a windowless basement flat in Stoke City or even the backseat of a 1978 Dodge LTD parked at the end of a dead-end street in Elkhart, Indiana. One glass and you can imagine yourself being someplace better. Ten glasses later and you’re asleep, dreaming of hanging out with Bobby Ray Valentine and Louis Winthorpe III at the end of Trading Places.

Tamdhu

Single Malt
Purchase Price: $22
Place of Purchase: Gotham Wine - New York, NY
Rating: 7.8

Tamdhu's young and a bit on the meek side, like a kitten peering around the corner when there are guests in the house. But, like kittens often are, it’s very inexpensive--not quite free, but one of the lowest-priced single malts out there. What you get for your money is a pleasant, grassy malt of indeterminate age. This mild-mannered citizen is a good dram to give to a friend or acquaintance intimidated by the reputation of Scotch whisky. And have some yourself while you’re at it!

Gibson's Finest 12 Year Old

Canadian Whisky
Purchase Price: $22 (1 Liter)
Place of Purchase: Toronto Airport Duty Free - Toronto, Ontario
Rating: 8.2

Another highly-respected brand from up north that really doesn't have much distribution in the States, as far as I know. In fact, I bought this bottle at the Duty Free shop in Toronto airport, where it was immediately wrapped up like a mummy in bubble wrap a good three inches thick. You simply cannot bring liquor aboard planes anymore like our parents used to do. Does anybody remember that episode of “Bewitched” when Darrin and Larry Tate carry on a couple bottles of Chivas Regal onto a Pan Am flight and end up getting soused with the pilot? Samantha ends up having to save everyone by landing the plane with her magic powers! Anyway, Gibson’s is buttery smooth and enticingly sweet--a winner through and through. Good luck finding it, though!

Brennan's

Irish Whiskey
Purchase Price: $19
Place of Purchase: Soho Wine and Spirits - New York, NY
Rating: 7.5

I had never heard of this whiskey before I saw a dusty bottle in Soho Wine and Spirits and my inquisitive nature did the rest. By evening time, I was in my room hunched over a glass. The modern-day Irish Whiskey drinker really doesn’t have a huge array of brands to choose from so it’s always good to see something new, but in the end, this just isn’t a very compelling quaff. It now holds the dubious distinction of being my least favorite Irish whiskey. Oh well, I guess something has to be!

Jim Beam Rye

Rye
Purchase Price: $17
Place of Purchase: Warehouse - New York, NY
Rating: 7.9


You can’t miss this bottle, the label is as yellow as a Hi-Liter and for all I know might have been the inspiration for that ubiquitous office supply. This is entry level-priced rye, but so are Old Overholt and Rittenhouse and they both offer more rye bite and depth of complexity for roughly the same price. UPDATE: I’ve seen some new bottles of this and it looks like they’ve scrapped that infamous shade of yellow that enabled you to check if it was in stock from the parking lot for a much less obtrusive beige color. And yet another proud tradition is asked to “lie still” while having shovelfuls of dirt thrown over it. A shame, really.

Elmer T. Lee

Bourbon
Purchase Price: $26
Place of Purchase: Bevmo - Somewhere between San Diego and Palm Springs, CA
Rating: 8.4

This is one excellent bourbon--it goes down like one of those endless multi-colored silk scarves magicians sometimes pull out of their mouth but possesses a bit more moisture and spicy-sweet taste. I remember watching a documentary about pumpkins on television that showed where certain talented pumpkin breeders had perfected the art of growing and harvesting square pumpkins. Elmer T. Lee is sold and distributed in a bottle that is a dead ringer for this farming phenomenon. Spookley the Square Pumpkin says, “Elmer T. Lee is the perfect drink to cap off a long day of raking leaves and wandering through the pumpkin patch.” I can think of no higher praise.

Effen

Vodka
Purchase Price: $25
Place of Purchase: Warehouse - New York, NY
Rating: 8.3

An Effen big surprise. Another winner from Holland. It's got a fairly transparent taste but still some lush grapes in there, too, which isn’t to say it is grape-flavored! I have a difficult time describing vodka sometimes but I know what I like and this one is near the top. The distillers have also been kind enough to wrap the middle of each bottle in a rubber sleeve so you can literally sway, rock and stumble about town with this in your mitt and never worry about dropping the bottle and shattering it against the cruel and unyielding pavement. It’s that kind of customer care that will take you straight to the top of the JDPower listings. If only they made such things for the human cranium!

Woodford Reserve

Bourbon
Purchase Price: $28
Place of Purchase: Warehouse - New York, NY
Rating: 8.0

Woodford's bottle is shaped like something you'd paddle a naughty schoolgirl with. Now is that really an object you want to have laying around the house where small children can see? I remember being told by a shopkeeper in Cirencester in the UK how good this bourbon is, but what else was he going to say--it was the only bourbon he carried!! Unless you want to count the Jack Daniel's he stocked, but that isn’t bourbon, so why are you bothering me about it? Woodford is an above-average bourbon with an above-average price tag and it is certainly worthy of your time, but it’s never really worked its way onto my favorites list. However, its unique shape does make it easy to hide a bottle in the toaster!

St. James Royal Ambre

Rum
Purchase Price: $20
Place of Purchase: Astor Wine - New York, NY
Rating: 4.1

If someone melted an old pile of bicycle inner tubes into black soup and then dumped that and some Domino's brown sugar into one of Shaq's old shoes from the LSU days, and then stirred it up for three days with an old oar they'd found at the bottom of a brackish lake, presto, you'd have St. James Royal Ambre rum. I probably should have poured it down the drain, but I bucked it up and finished the bottle, generally forcing down teeny little thimble sips on nights I was already blind drunk. Pathetic behavior, I know, but it neatly matched this pathetic offering.

Glenrothes 1987

Single Malt
Purchase Price: $85+
Place of Purchase: Gift
Rating: 7.8

This bottle looks like an old-fashioned bomb a turn of the 20th century anarchist might tote around under his tattered cloak whilst tracking down corrupt politicians or particularly egregious members of the bourgeoisie. I received this as a gift and it is a likable enough quaff, but at the price being asked, it is definitely asking a lot of you and then falling a bit short in the return category. It’s my first encounter with Glenrothes so I’m not really sure what the “taste profile” is for this distillery, but this particular expression seems just a trifle washed-out. The distiller himself writes some character notes right on the label, and although my palate never really caught hold of the citrus notes promised and the orange zest never really materialized, there were some nice vanilla notes and that’s about what could be said of this bottling. Nice, but too mild-mannered for the admission price.

Powers Gold Label

Irish Whiskey
Purchase Price: $21
Place of Purchase: Warehouse - New York, NY
Rating: 8.5

In America, Powers is kind of a "cult" whiskey--I’m always hearing about how it's the biggest selling Irish whiskey in Ireland, but really, why should I care about that or what the best-selling French wine is in France or what the most popular Russian vodka is in Russia? What I need to know is if what's in the glass in front of me is any good. And the answer to that is that Powers comes through with flying colors every time. Every bottle of this I buy lasts about two weeks--I can't keep away from it. Powers is as soft and sweet-tempered as that “thing” that appears in the Snuggle fabric softener ads and every bit as appealing to lonely housewives. It is my favorite blended Irish Whiskey and pretty much renders Bushmills and Jameson completely extraneous.

Absolut Level

Vodka
Purchase Price: $20
Place of Purchase: Warehouse - New York, NY
Rating: 8.5

This just may be my favorite vodka and that's saying something because I think “normal” or “original” Absolut is syrupy rubbish. Level is clean as the proverbial whistle, crisp as Foxy lettuce and I honestly think I could drink a whole bottle at one sitting and may have even come close to doing so on certain occasions. Recommended as heartily as regular Absolut is marked a must to avoid. I just wonder what they do to this to make it so much of an improvement. It’s as if your neighbor started tinkering with his old Yugo Friday night and had an Aston Martin DB9 sitting in his drive come Saturday morning! Even more incredible are the rumors that the shiny miniature bottle silhouette attached to the front is made of platinum. There’s no way that could be true!

Duggan's Dew

Blended Scotch
Purchase Price: $16
Place of Purchase: Warehouse - New York, NY
Rating: 8.2

Duggan's Dew has a rep as a "cheap" brand in certain circles, but in reality, like so many other little-known blends, it's merely inexpensive. I actually have a bottle of this at the moment and it's been growing on me more and more. It reminds me a bit of Grant's Family Reserve, very robust and chewy with a lingering butterscotch element to it that reminds me of trips taken to various Ohio Dairy Queens around 1974when the Wings song "Band on the Run" ruled the airwaves and Butterscotch sundaes served up in a plastic batting helmet were often the treat of choice. Nice.